Sweat is dripping down my face, my hands are trembling and general nausea is overwhelming me. I feel extremely uncomfortable. It’s not an awkward comment of a guy, I didn’t flash the entire line up and I have not made a rude comment. Nope, I am beyond uncomfortable because I am changing my old habits. I have a tendency to be the Mother Theresa on the work-floor. “Yes of course, I will pick that up because I am loyal and work hard and love this work”. Except for endless hours in the office, beyond limited personal time and heaps of frustration, that approach never got me anywhere.
Thus I am changing my approach by setting clear boundaries for this new opportunity I am looking into. This is what I will do for you in this amount of time and in return you pay me this. Clear and simple as that. By working on this though, I felt that I was agitated, sweaty and nervous. Thoughts running through my mind: “This is not me, I am super loyal, I will do everything”. But all these symptoms are so uncomfortable because I am changing my old pattern. I am now going after what I deserve by putting a foot on the ground.
So even though this change is extremely uncomfortable, it is even more so ridiculously necessary. I want to receive what I deserve and therefore need to change that old habit of picking everything up and leaving everything out in the open. And I did and I felt relief. Even more important, there was this amazing feeling of pride.